Feminism: A Misplacement of Priority - Labby Owoboye

A thorough scrutiny of Chimamanda Adichie's feminist manifesto and other feminist arguments provide the basis of this polemic. Let me start by asking this pressing question which has been consistently echoing in my mind for days. Is it that we don't really understand that feminism as a concept is an agenda sponsoring by a few people to serve the interest of a few people or we know but feel unconcerned? 

The content of Adichie's feminist manifesto is perilous and so much detrimental to the minds of a girl-child. It's like re-engineering her brain, orientation and belief which has no good to offer than to finally puncture the destabilizing society. 

It is on this basis that I loudly, but calmly call upon each and every person who believes in preservation of an ideal society to join me in the rescue mission of our derailed feminists from the road that lead to nowhere other than disaster, destruction and disorderliness or what will you call the agony of a single mother. Adichie and her co-feminists just woke up one day and thought of imposing their personal view on how society should be without any finding of why it is what it is. In her said feminist manifesto, she said girls should be treated like men and I am inclined to ask, in what area has men ever claimed unreasonable total superiority over women? 

A man's wife is always his closest associate and adviser or better still his controller except on a very few occasion. Before he can make any decision, he will definitely consult his wife first and if she is intelligent enough, she can influence his decision. So what is unequal in that? By virtue of religious belief, Man was created and a woman was removed from his rib. The Yoruba tradition of origin never mentioned a female as the first human being, but man, Oduduwa. 

It goes like this virtually in all the traditions of origin of all the races of the World. So what genuine justification is our acclaimed feminists have to prove this wrong? That apart, the contemporary Yoruba setting gives more regard to a girl-child than it gives to a boy-child. 

I remember when my sister was in higher institution and I was in grammar school, my parent would pack all sorts of foodstuffs and instruct me to take them to my sister in school with some particular amount of money. I was fascinated by this and anticipating how I would also be treated with care the same way my sister was treated when I got to University. Alas, I was wrong. The day I resumed to my University, I was given six pieces of yam, grounded melon and a sum of #2000 at a time when my transport fare cost #1500. This is the case in almost every Yoruba family and despite this, boy-child will never complain of injustice or have you ever seen boys or guys lamenting over it? That is one reason you can't equate boys to girls. They both have their area of specialization. 

In academia, you must contemplate and do your research before jumping to conclusion and not the other way round. Before arguing blindly or equating girls to boys, there are civilized procedure that's expected to follow. You will have to consult psychologists to know how girls think and how boys think and factors engendering their thoughts. You will consult historians to draw inferences from the lives of individuals and societies they have studied so far. You will consult medical practitioners for better understanding on medical fitness of both sex and primary/secondary school teachers for knowledge on how both sex behave naturally from the oral stage of sexualization through phallic, Odipedia to puberty stage. Parents are not excluded because they understand better. 

When a woman trains a child, she trains a nation. Whenever your husband takes care of your baby in your presence or absence, he is helping you and discharging his duty at the same time. He is discharging his duty in the sense that you both have the child while he's helping you because that's your area of specialization and not his. Women are believed to be excellent at taking care of child than men are. Look around you and compare a girl raise by single mother with the one raise by single father. It's obvious that the one raise by single mother will enjoy parental care than the one raise by single father. This is why it's said that woman should be with child upon a divorce. Their area of specialization is different. It is like telling a carpenter to work as electrician. He(carpenter) can't do it like a real electrician no matter how smart he is. 

Let's quickly analysis the tenure of Okonjo Iweala as a finance minister and Chief Obafemi Awolowo as a commissioner of finance. Awolowo served as a commissioner of finance at a time when Nigeria fought its thirty years civil war and despite the cost of the war, he didn't borrow a kobo from any international lender. Compare him with Okonjo Iweala or Kemi Adeosun. 

How you raise your child will undoubtedly affect the society. What do we expect to happen to children when both father and mother leave for work in the early morning and come back at night? The mother is claiming she is not a slave or nanny and that it's responsibility of both of them to take care of their children equally but this same mother has forgotten how her mother almost single-handedly raised her to become who is she today. 

Now we are lamenting over the barbaric attitudes of primary and secondary school students not minding to dig deep the historical causes of their destabilizing attitudes towards society. If you are married and you want to raise a well-mannered child, then either of you(the couple) has to dedicate much of his/her time to that purpose. That's not even about inequality, it's about reaching a consensus. To be frank, there is nothing like equality in the World let alone in marriage. Why some are rich while others are poor? Why do we have one person as leader and others as followers? Why can't all of us be president at the same time? These are questions we are expecting you to provide answers to if you truly understand the uncivilized agenda you're agitating for. In marriage, one of the two must be a super-ordinate while the other be a subordinate and this doesn't suggest that a man must naturally be super-ordinate, no, it could be the woman, but both of them can't be equal "shikenah". 

They, feminists, emotionally argued that a girl-child should be allowed to be what she wants to be and not what the parents or societies want her to be and one is tends to ask; what if she wants to be a thief or proustite. Should we still allow her because it's a free World? 

The point is, she can't be allowed to be what contradict to the reality of life. She is not the only victim of the circumstances as there are also some boys who act like girls, but their parents always correct them right from their childhood while the few that are not lucky to be corrected mistakenly turned to gays when they grew up. A man was explaining his philosophy of free World to another man and the second man asked if the first man would like to see his farm. When they got to the farm, the first man exclaimed: "Why? this is not a farm. There is nothing here but weeds. Well, you see, said the owner, I didn't want to infringe upon the liberty of the farm in any way. I was just giving the farm a chance to express itself and to choose its own production. I hope you can understand my farm analogy! For your farm to produce crops, you must remove the weed and take care of it properly. One day, in the class of international relation, my lecturer was asking us why women and girls are always the victims of war, but I couldn't express myself satisfactorily in that class, otherwise, I would have asked what he meant by saying women and girls are victims of war. To me, it's absurd to subscribe to such belief. What of male soldiers who died or lost one or the other part of their bodies in the course of defending the state at the battlefield? 

Who are the real victims between them? It's just unfortunate that we always over hype anything woman. Enforcing girls to get involved in men stuff is like imposing on them, what they don't really have interest in. Girls with the exception of few don't want to get involved in such stuff voluntarily. They want to dress gorgeously. They want to be patronized by several men before ending up with one. They want to get involved in more easier,but brainy task which can give them enough time to take care of themselves. They want to get married because of many things which shelter(sex) is just one. They want to have babies. They want to raise a child whether boy or girl because they enjoy being identified as successful mothers and most importantly, they want to be an underground force influencing the decisions of their husbands. Ask Patience Jonathan, Turai Yaradua, Mariam Babangida or Michelle Obama to choose between being the President or First Lady. You will be surprised when they choose the latter over the former.

In Africa, women are busy with building families while men are busy with building communities. 

Feminism has not and can not stop men from cheating. It's like thinking corruption will be totally eradicated in the World. It's just not possible. So, telling me that married women should also be free to cheat is not bizarre to me because they are doing it already. And to encourage the good ones to follow suit is like paying evil with evil which I doubt can provide the equality you're craving for. It will only turn the good ones to bad ones, even more worse that the married men you're accusing. There are many ways of curbing cheating, but feminism is out of it. The number of single-mothers is drastically increasing in the name of feminism. Married women are so in haste that they can't tolerate simple thing in marriage. Hence, they become single-mothers. And how do you expect single-mothers to satisfy their sexual urges whenever the need arises other than flirting with other married men whose their wives don't quickly join to conclusion unnecessarily? They are now becoming part of what they preach against. Is that kind of society you are clamoring for? 

The feminist agenda in Africa is a misplacement of priority and it would have been better if these so-called feminists like Chimamanda Adichie dedicate the resource and energy they are putting on the mirage(Feminism) on something rewarding like development in science and technology, agriculture and industry. The western World you're imitating also has its history. Women were not recognized in those states until World War I and subsequently the second World war. Those women did not earn their space through online articles or unnecessary lamentation, they earned it through actions. They occupied the industries when their men were at battlefield and withdrew upon their arrival. Despite their remarkable actions and boldness, it still took them many years after the wars before they were granted franchise or right to vote and be voted for. I hope you have read or heard about Aduni Oluwole who was of the belief that Nigeria was not ripe for self-government. She died with that idea. So if you see anyone advocating unrealistic agenda, tell them they are living in fantasy and they will eventually die with the agenda even if they spend over 200years in this World. Feminism without gainsay is misplacement of priority. 

The white discrimination against the black race issue which is far more important to Africa than any agenda has not been overcome yet and you're bringing up another one which lack any reasonable justification for its existence. It would have been better if we focus on emancipation of black Africa in totality, the improvement in science and technology because these are what we need and not feminism. I'm not in support of inequality in marriage, but I believe the feminism gesture which is being exhibited lately is overreaction because women are already in charge.